• Sydney Renee - The Diary of She

Let the Reason Be You

When I decided to go to college, I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do with my life. I was always told that if I wanted to obtain an excellent career, it was a must to further my education first.

Like most students entering college, I spent a year undeclared and still didn’t know what I wanted to do as far as a career was concerned. Instead of pondering on what I was going to declare as my major, I spent my summer writing and blogging. For as long as I can remember, I spent all my time catching up on the latest news in entertainment and then blogging about it. If I wasn’t blogging, I was writing in my journal because I found it easier to express myself with a pen and paper. That’s when it hit me; I was going to major in Journalism with an emphasis in Magazine.

College gave me the opportunity to experience what it was like to write for a newspaper and magazine. It showed me that I had the skills to write on a wide range of topics that didn’t deal with just music and celebrity gossip. I got the chance to speak to parents of children with autism, women and men of the LGBT community, as well as attend City Council meetings. I was still allowed the freedom to express myself in my own opinion column in the school newspaper. I even interned for a nightlife blog/magazine company.

While working on the school newspaper and doing my internship, I still found time to keep up with my own writing. I was on a high when it came to writing, and I decided I was going to write a book. I spent every night putting together what I seen as the perfect urban fiction novel. Then life hit and I became discouraged. College was coming to an end for me, and I was also pregnant. I was let go from my internship because they wanted me to put in more hours there than at my paying job, but I couldn’t. The job bringing in income took priority because I had to think about the life growing inside of me. In between time, I tried to look for freelance work, but all of my proposals were being denied, and major companies felt like I didn’t have enough experience. No one told me that getting a degree didn’t guarantee that I would get my dream job.

When it came to my writing, everything came to a standstill. The passion I once had disappeared and I gave up on my dreams of being the writer I knew I could be. For years, I abandoned the book I started and let my blog fade away. What was the point of moving forward when no one wanted to give me a start? Well, I’m here to tell you that you can’t let the light in you be dimmed by those who don’t see your potential. Sometimes, we have to take matters into our own hands. I needed to move forward for myself; that was the point. I didn’t want to go through life regretting never going for what I wanted, and that’s why I’ve regained my passion for writing. Instead of telling myself I want to be a writer, I started to tell myself I AM A WRITER.

I’ve gotten back into writing my poems and posting excerpts of them on my Instagram page. I’ve gotten back into posting almost daily on my blog—The Diary of She to give myself more inspiration to get back to writing the books I started.

In order to succeed, I had to tell myself that I cannot be afraid to fail. It’s also important that I build a fan base, meaning I cannot be afraid of being judged by those reading my posts. Broadcasting my work may bring judgment, but the feedback could also be beneficial. Posting my excerpts on Instagram and the link to my website was a start to showcasing my work, but I knew I needed to take it a step further. That’s why I decided to switch my profile from a personal account to a business account, stamping me as a writer in my bio. Creating this account prompted me to make a page on Facebook as well. I was hesitant when it came to creating my pages, but it’s slowly but surely getting my work out there. In order to succeed, you have to be willing to invest in yourself.

Every day I’ve been feeding my passion. It can be hard and I may even want to give up sometimes, but then I remember that nothing in life comes easy. I’m going to keep pushing until I have multiple books under my belt and people that I can inspire, and I hope all those writers out there have the strength to do the same.

Sydney Renee

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